..I will get my things and roll today...I looked at Ray" Ray tried to hide a smile as Laura was begging him to forgive her, that it would never happen again and Rachelle buried her head in her hands in shame. Ray then said, "Wow, Bill I have to figure this out...this is insane...Laura I cant believe you cheated on me...(Rachelle then raised her face like she was going to defend Laura and Ray and I feared she might tell about the jacking off on her in her sleep)" Ray then backed off on Laura and held her and kissed her cheek saying "I forgive you, let me think about this...OK" Rachelle seemed to relax and she looked at me, I mouthed for her not to tell more. I suggested Ray take the day off from work, he said he could call and go in late. I looked at Rachelle and said, "lets go get coffee elsewhere so we can talk and they can talk" about then Ray and Laura's k**s were waking up.... Ray called his boss and I Rachelle took a quick shower, I walked over to Laura as she fixed her. My life.It sits there mocking me, knowing that I will never escape its hold on me. I hate this chair with all my being. I can feel my soul growing darker with each day’s passing.My mind rages on. Why did life have to be so cruel? Why can’t I find the happiness that others seem to have? Why do I have to be stuck in this permanent hell? “Why does God hate me?” I say out loud.As I struggle to move my legs from the warmth of my bed, I swing them in unison over the edge. Using my cane, I pull on the wheelchair’s arm to bring my jailer closer to me.I hate everything about it. The shiny mocking chrome of its frame. The blue of the seat and arm rests. The blackness of the rubber tires. The squeak of my body being plunked down into my cage, my jail.I think to myself how people either treat me as someone to be ignored or someone who can just ‘figure it out for myself’. However, the ones that give me the horrified look when I do open my mouth and must ask for help really set my brain to.
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